In Jesus’ ministry he heals the blind more than once, sometimes with mud, sometimes with touching their eyes, sometimes with simply saying it is so.  At the end of Matthew 20 Jesus is walking with a rather large crowd toward Jerusalem for Passover (and what will be His final hours) when two blind beggars cry out to him for help-to have mercy on them.  Though the crowd tries to quiet them, Jesus stops and asks a propelling question, “What would you like me to do for you?”

Stop and think about that for a minute.  If the God of the Universe just asked you what can I do for you…what would you say?  Now for these men calling out they answered “we want to see.”  And Jesus opened their eyes and then they followed him.

I was inspired to write this by the sermon I heard this morning at Calvary Chapel Melbourne which was in fact based off of this piece of scripture.  What got to me was that question: If God came up to me and asked me, “What would you like me to do for you?” what would I say?  Would I short-sight God?  I’ve written about an idea that has been laid on my heart, with very few details, but if I were to ask God for it, would I think too small for what He really has planned for that future ministry?  Or if I were to ask about my other issue (jobs) would I be too small in thinking and simply ask that I have one so I can no longer be unemployed?  At the same time I was dealing with a migraine (something that often plagues me and is not simply a hinderance but can put me out of commission if bad enough).  Would I ask him for healing when in His big picture my pain can be used for something that is somehow beyond my understanding?

As you can see it’s not the simple question one might originally think.  I began to settle on revelation (or rather, asking for it).  Asking for clear and explicit details on what and how I am supposed to serve God (in what compasity, working where, whole nine yards).  But then I realized, he answers that when we ask for it–> In HIS time (thats whats hard for me).  You see, I’ve had a difficult time the past couple months being out of school and not working because I believed thats what I was supposed to do.  God showed me that I was needed at home pretty quickly and I accepted that (somewhat unhappily at first but grew to adjust).  Now as the summer is winding down, I’m beginning to wonder what time frame I am here for.  I still have that passion and dream for the organization for teen girls but I have a drive to advocate and lobby (something I have always loved and is actually in my field of study) for issues that matter to me.  I began to wonder if that organization is something that might derive from a youth group somewhere down the line after I’ve been able to volunteer and get to know some kids, talk to them, build those relationships.  Maybe pull some other female youth volunteers and have that as the get go, in one youth group and ave it develop from there to wherever God wants it to go.

Ultimately, “we want to see”  I want to see God in His glory.  I want to see where I am supposed to be to best exude the light that he shines from me.  I want to reach the lost in ways I didn’t think I could because I was scared.  I want to see Jesus in a dark world where He is needed the most.  Jesus, I want to see.