A myriad of excuses arise whenever people face difficulties, especially with marriage problems. Kyle and I began our first of 4 marriage pre-counseling sessions with the pastor who will be performing our ceremony. This week focused somewhat on getting to know us, but to also address a key component to maintaining the ability to work through issues. That key, the thing that can keep people together in even the most amazingly difficult times it agape.

Agape love is that love which comes from God and can not exist without God. There are in fact three types of love: philia, eros, and then agape. Philia may be somewhat recognizable…think of a famous Pennsylvania city-brotherly love or the love that you feel for your best friend. Then there is eros. This is that passionate, sexual love. For a marriage you need both eros and philia, and can’t be survive without the other. Then above both of the others is agape. Like I mentioned before, agape love is given first by God so we can in turn share it with others. It is sacrificial and unselfish (“For God so LOVED-agape-the world that he gave his only son”). Marriage needs all three types of love to survive but the key beyond loving each other with this love, is to first love God.

When there is a strain on your personal relationship with God, you not loving him as you should, then you in turn will face difficulty in loving others in this manner. It is like a triangle of components to maintain such a powerful love.

obey His word

/                       \

worship—prayer

When these 3 are cooperating then you will be experiencing the ability to love others (in this case your spouse) with that same agape love, thus loving them with a sacrificial love. How endearing is that. To be loved with a love that you know that that person would give their life for you. This in itself gives you a greater strength to withstand trials and tribulations. It makes something that was once breakable and fragile (depending on either Eros or philia) to intangible and permanent (agape). This is forever kind of love–this is the marriage that God intended.